Branston Pickle

Oh, my parents eat this stuff on everything. Sandwiches and hot dogs or sausage. It's a Branston Pickle copycat recipe. My dad makes and jars it about twice a year.

9 oz carrots
1 medium rutabega
4 cloves garlic
4.5 oz dates
1 medium head cauliflower
2 onions
2 apples
2 zucchini (unpeeled)
15 sweet gherkins
1/2 lb dark brown sugar
1 tsp salt
2 oz lemon juice
12 oz malt vinegar
1 tbs worcestershire
2 tsp mustard seeds
2 tsp allspice
1 tsp cayenne pepper

I think my dad usually adds turmeric and also the recipe calls for Kitchen Bouquet browning sauce, but forget it.

Cube and/or chop all ingredients. Combine all in pot and bring to boil, then reduce heat and simmer for about 2 hours (until the rutabega is cooked but firm). If you have the browning sauce, add that until it turns dark brown. Seal it in clean jars. Leave set for 3 weeks to let the flavor age.

Eat it on whatever. Ploughman's lunch includes cheese, bread, salad, apple, tomato, beets, pickled onion, etc.

Crumpets!

Oh my goodness.... you can't even.... oh, how to describe a crumpet to someone who'd never had tea with a British grandmother. They're... crispy and chewy and soft and... sigh. No, there's nothing like a nice toasted crumpet. People always think of them as English muffin type deals, but not really. In fact, English muffins were invented by Americans. Did you know that? It's true.

2 1/2 tbs active dry yeast

1 tsp sugar

1/3 c warm water

2.5 c bread flour

1 3/4 c milk

1 tsp salt

1/2 tsp baking soda

1. Mix sugar and yeast in warm water. Let stand for five minutes. It's supposed to bubble, I'm sure you know that.

2. Stir in the flour, milk, salt, and baking soda. Cover in plastic wrap and let stand for 30 minutes.

3. Heat a griddle to medium. Arrange round cookie cutters on the greased griddle and pour batter (3 tbs, but who measures? Newbies.) into each ring. Cook until the tops are bubbly and porous, flip and cook until set on the other side. About ten minutes per crumpet.

4. Toast in the toaster, eat with butter and jam.

Devonshire Cream

Devonshire cream is a dip/topping. For fruit, primarily. And it's from, surprise, Devonshire. (I guess. I don't know. I assume it's from Devonshire, but knowing the British it could well be an old Brummy recipe or something. Hell, my folks are Cornish, what do I know?) Probably not good for the lactose intolerant and, sadly, another of those things we can't have when Liam's near.

8 oz cream cheese
12 oz sour cream
1 lemon, juiced
2 tsp vanilla
2 c powdered sugar

One step: Mix until sugar is completely dissolved, and have at it.

Bubble and Squeak

Katie informs me that (normal) Americans don't eat bubble and squeak. I cannot believe it! What do you do with your leftover greens? Pff. I know, people always make fun of English cooking and yes, it is true that my parents tend to eat bland, overcooked vegetables; but I really. Really. Love. Bubble and squeak.

2 cups cooked, shredded Cabbage
1 Onion sliced or chopped
1 lb Potatoes
3 tbs Butter
salt and pepper to taste
oil

1. Peel, boil, and mash potatoes with butter. (Do not add milk.) Season with salt and pepper.
2. Usually we use leftover cabbage for this, but if you aren't: cook in water and 1 tbs butter until tender. Mix together with potato.
3. In a skillet, heat some oil and add the onion, cooking until soft. Add the potato and cabbage mixture and press down atop cooked onions to form a flat cake.
4. Cook over medium heat until browned on the bottom, for about 15 minutes. Transfer upside down onto a plate and heat another 2 tbs (approximately) of oil. Replace cake in the skillet and brown on the other side.

Transfer to plate again, cut into wedges, and serve.

Rarebit

Welsh rarebit is probably one of my all time favorite British foods (aside from beans on toast, of course) and here is how we make it. It's good any time, all the time, every time.

3 tbs butter
6 oz cheddar cheese
1 tbs beer
1 tsp dry mustard
1 tsp Worcetershire
1 egg, beaten
Baguette sliced and toasted
salt and pepper to taste

1. Melt butter in saucepan. Stir in salt & pepper, mustard, and worcetershire. Cook until bubbly and smooth. Remove from heat. Add beerand cheese, stir until melted.
2. Spoon over toast.

That's it! You can also substitute the beer for either whiskey or milk. Sometimes this is called "Welsh Rabbit" but I don't know why, since it's quite vegetarian.